On Friday, December 8th, I was diagnosed with breast cancer.
During the first part of January, 2018, I will have a double mastectomy to rid my body of this invasion. This news has most certainly slowed on our transition to California. For those of your who were not aware of our move, my family was planning to move to Ventura, California at the first of the year for my husband to pursue music in television, commercial, and film. While it has been a shock to all of us, one thing is for sure: God knows what He is doing.
Do I feel sad? Yes. Am I disappointed? Yes. Do I get angry? Totally. Will it change my faith and trust in God? NOPE. I am in no way trying to sound self-righteous or like I have all the answers or that I am not phased one bit. On the contrary! There have been many moments I have been brought to my knees, pleading with Him to help me understand why He chose this part of my journey to happen. The answer from Him I hear constantly in my heart is, “Trust Me, I’ve got you.” And with that, I have no choice but to trust Him with all I can muster inside of my soul. You see, I have a long list of moments in my life where I have had to do just that, and He has never left me or forsaken me, even when I felt alone. Why would He leave me now? He won’t. He has always made His presence known and brought me to better place one way or another. While getting over the initial shock, a sweet friend gave me something to consider: this news of cancer is a beautiful reminder of what Mary, mother of Jesus, must have felt when God gave her the incredible responsibility to carry the Savior of the World in her belly. I, in no way, consider myself an equal with Mary!! My point is that she felt overwhelmed in many ways as she and Joseph made their way to Bethlehem. She knew to whom she was giving birth, and she experienced rejection, discomfort, frustration, uncertainty, and many other unpleasant things, I’m sure, in the moments along the way to the birth of her son. All of those moments ultimately led to something amazing, which was the birth of our Lord, Jesus Christ, who would ultimately sacrifice his own life to save ours. I believe this diagnosis has a greater purpose and meaning for my family. One that will allow us to continue to testify to the glory of our Lord, His mercies, His grace, and His deep LOVE for every single one of us.
I am so grateful for the prayers and support our family has been given so far. It has blown my mind, honestly. As surgery approaches and I have to take a break from the things I love to do (for example, riding with my Zyn22 family!), I am comforted by His grace and mercy that we found the cancer when we did and that we are surrounded by the family and friends who bring us so much comfort and joy. Cancer will not define me. It will shape me into more of who He longs for me to become. I am ready to practice what I preach in my spin classes, “God created the one and only me for a purpose: I will not give up.” HE will fight for me, especially when I don’t have the strength because I KNOW I will have days ahead when I won’t want to fight. It will be in those moments that I will have to make a conscious choice to allow God to continue to give me the strength to keep going.
Where does God have you, right now? Do you believe He fights for you? Do you believe He cares? I hope and pray you know He does.
I hold these truths deep in my heart, and I invite you to do the same:
Joshua 1:9 “Have I not commanded you? Be strong and courageous. Do not be afraid; do not be discouraged, for the Lord your God will be with you wherever you go.”
Isaiah 40:31 “Yet those who wait for the Lord will gain new strength; They will mount up with wings like eagles, they will run and not get tired, they will walk and not become weary.”
Exodus 14:14 “The Lord will fight for you. You only need to be still.”
And my personal fave…Proverbs 3:5-6 “Trust in the Lord with all you heart; lean not on your own understanding. In all your ways acknowledge Him and He will make your paths straight.”
Blessings and Health!
Jennifer Kieta is a native Texan, born and raised in Houston. She graduated from Texas Tech University and has lived in Fort Worth since 1996. Jennifer worked as a Child Life Specialist at Cook Children’s Medical Center for 9 years before becoming a full-time mommy to her two daughters. In the fall of 2014, Jennifer started training and soon became a spin instructor for Zyn22, a boutique spin studio here in Fort Worth. Her love of and belief in taking care of your mind, soul, and body has always been a priority, and she looks forward to sharing that love with her community!